Wednesday, November 26, 2014

Week 18

Week 18!! I already have 2 baby registries for the baby shower, Amazon and Babies R Us. I still have 11 weeks left for the baby shower and I think I am pretty much done with the big stuff. Now to make my invitations, well.. They are already made, I just need to print them out, put them together and send them out. 

Hmm, this week I was starting to worry a bit. The other day I had uncontrollable shakes,  my hands were shaking as if I was cold and my legs were trembling and not allowing me to walk correctly. Right now it's day two and I still don't feel 100%. Of course I had to Google it and it says that some women have labor shakes. What that means is that my body is currently low on blood sugar, perhaps taking out all the fatty foods and not going ham on chocolates and slushys is taking a toll. 

I am currently writing some of this blog while waiting for my next client, thank God she is late. I really needed this little break. From now on I'm going to have a stash of snacks in my car, even though I sound like a total fat ass I should have nuts, protein bars or just chips. Yes, I have water with me but now I'm starting to get hungry. 

Ughhh, I didn't save the other paragraph I wrote. I left my apps open and my psychoticness of closing all apps to save battery got the best of me. "/ sooo im keeping this one short because I can't remember what I wrote, not only fault of pregnancy brain but in general.. If I don't write it I won't remember it. 

This week you are the size of a sweet potato at 5.6". Hmm I wanna cut you up into pieces and deep fry you into julienne fries. 

You are punching, kicking, rolling and twisting. Yawning, hiccuping, sucking and swallowing. Here im reading that many women get backaches and this explains all my pain. Trouble sleeping, check! Insomnia is kicking in again, I was just getting used to knocking out at 9pm. 

Saturday, November 22, 2014

Week 17

Starting the week off and honestly speaking I feel weak. I hate expressing my feelings and especially when it comes to matters of the heart. In the past 2 weeks I have been bottling up every emotion I can feel and I have come to a breaking point. I have looked up prenatal depression because I feel as I always had a minor case of depression and anxiety growing up, I just always hid it and didn't tell many. My anti depression became music and I would drown myself out into it, that was until I became of age and was introduced to vodka. God, I need a drink right about now... a beer... anything would suffice. I know I am not supposed to be stressing out, stress can lean towards anxiety and depression as well as miscarriage. I don't know why I am actually writing this out but for the very few that actually read all the crap I post, I Thank you. I know that there is someone out there who actually cares enough to read it and perhaps they felt the same way or went through what I was/is/or am going to. This week I have just about broken down and no one knows how much, I have written other blogs in which I have kept to myself or deleted.. still haven't put much consideration as to what I am going to do with this one.

I know that I have always lived a certain lifestyle, a "dream" as many would call it. Many say that I live in a fake world of fantasy... is that really such a bad thing? Wanting a perfect family growing up, wanting a lifestyle of pure happiness, wanting a stable career and a life where I can do what I love everyday. Wanting to come home to a big beautiful house where everyone in it is content, nurturing and loving. The world we live in now kinda sucks, living every day wondering what the next person will do to you. I actually lived every relationship thinking might as well hurt that person before they hurt me, runaway when things get tough and never let your guard down. Old habits kind of die hard. Well, honestly speaking I really don't want any comments on this blog. I don't want the "I am sorry, I know what your are going through" or the "get over it, thats the way life is" (yeah i get that a lot from family) "you have a beautiful family and you shouldnt feel this way for the baby". I get it, I'm depressed not stupid.. I know what I am supposed to be feeling but I can't, I just want these feelings to go away and thats why I am opening up. I am letting my feelings out so that way I can feel as if I am being heard, I am expressing myself to the universe because I want better. I don't want to live falling asleep nor waking up in tears. I don't want to have this conversation with any of you, this is the reason I am writing it and not speaking it. I don't want the constant reminder that I feel like this so please just let me be.

I know its not like any of my other chippy weekly blogs but I am writing these blogs to just write.


Today I feel better .. so again. I don't wanna hear about it. 

Lets see this week little booger is stretching out to average 5.1'' which is supposed to be a size of an onion. Umm, I am not quite sure about this weeks size because all the onions I have ever seen here in Miami are quite small.

This week he/she is growing little by little and basically just putting on some weight. With that he/she is growing a stronger and thicker umbilical cord. Supposedly mothers should be showing by now and putting on some weight, especially second time mothers. This week I am 4 months and 1 week and thank god I have only gained 5 lbs. most women gain 5-10 lbs. by this time being that its almost 1/2 there. I have a little bump which continues to grow and it actually says as of this week my boobs are supposed to be getting itchy.. (they kind of are)

Wednesday, November 19, 2014

Week 16

It's starting to get cold! That means next week it will be hot again, yippee the joys of Miami. "/ 

I don't think you like the cold already, I feel you most when it's warm but I guess when I am cold you are too because you freeze up in there. Most probably ruled up into a little ball all warm and cozy in there. Ohh, and you must be thinking you are on a roller coaster in there, wondering how clumsy your mother is. I have already busted my butt twice in 2 weeks!! Once when we were cleaning the house I fell straight on my butt which hurt the most. Next was when I was running to the bathroom because you don't allow me to hold my bladder anymore, slipped at the curve ate the corner wall and luckily landed on my knees. I'm not usually this clumsy!! I am really good at keeping my balance but you have me on the edge these days. 

This week you have seriously surprised me with your growth. You are getting to be as big as an avocado ranging at 4.6 inches. 

I am currently 4 months now, and you are beginning to hear my voice. Oh boy, I am sorry for all the things you are hearing so early but this is a crazy family sooo might as well get used to it. You are starting to grow hair, eyelashes and eyebrows. Here is the week that most pregnant women start feeling their babies. You have given me ENORMOUS boobs and Pregnancy Brain as most women like to call it. 

Monday, November 17, 2014

Week 15

Week 15 wooowwww next week that's it 4 months. Holy crap again, this has flown by!! It's crazy I keep feeling the little booger more and more each day. For the past 2 days it's been kicking or stretching and it's really bothering me, I didn't feel it this fast with Jaiden. 

I've been pretty much down this whole week, a little depression mode. We were supposed to have a gender reveal party and for certain reasons it didn't happen. I also have been non-stop working which is GREAT but i haven't had time to prepare anything. We will be waiting until our next appointment for final confirmation on gender before proceeding. I know you guys are just waiting for me to post it as much as I'm waiting to figure out what the heck it is. 

Only 3 months left for the baby shower, yes, I'm already planning. I can't invite 1/2 the ppl I want to... I already have a list that I am trying to cut down to 100 but I think it's staying at 115. Invites are ready to be printed and put together and the registry is 1/2 done. 

Hmm this week we are as big as a Navel Orange. 

I can feel you squirming around in there even though most pregnancies don't quite feel anything just yet. You might have already started hiccuping and you can now move all your limbs. Holy moly yes you can, I feel it every time you stretch!! 

Sunday, November 9, 2014

Week 14

Woohoo!! Second Trimester.. 

November 9th at 1:06pm I called Ricky to feel my stomach. He even said he felt something!! I've been feeling the little booger for a while now but finally Ricky was able to partake in the feeling. Jaiden tried to feel and by then the feeling stopped, he asked me if its trying to get 

This week we had a little trip to CT. for my cousins wedding in NJ. We also had a little "family photoshoot" in NY. 

We had an amazing time at my cousins wedding. 

As well as at my sisters house 

Sorry, going photo overload this week. We had a lot of amazing moments captured :) 

I have also been extremely busy with my Christmas mini sessions that I haven't had time to take my 14th week photo. Since the studio is set up like a bed I'm going to have to improvise with another location. Well, I have been feeling better lately but when it's a little too much I still kind've black out. 

Next week we will be hosting a GENDER REVEAL party for the family, so I hope no one posts any photos just yet. I want to keep you guys in suspense for a little bit longer.

I'm counting the days left!! 4 weeks left until we go to Disney for the 
             Very Mery Christmas 
💚❤️💚❤️💚 🎄🎅 💚❤️💚❤️💚

Hopefully I am showing just a little bit more because damn skippy I will be trying to take a few maternity pictures in front of MY castle. Yes, I claimed that castle when I was younger. Lol. 

Well, this week you have grown up to 3.4 inches and you're the size of an average lemon (not a miami lemon though lol) 

You are probably sucking your thumb as well as wiggling your toes and fingers. Because your vital organs are growing and you can finally start peeing this might be a reason I am now EVEN MORE constant in the bathroom. Trust me I know this is just the beginning.